Skip to main content

"Te nosce" - Know thyself

Go Search
Home
"Te nosce" - My Blog
Academic Wiki
Robby's Documents
  

Corn-bread.org > "Te nosce" - Know thyself
My thoughts and observations as I attempt to make sense of it all.
A post on Fark.com today
Social scientists have completed a study saying that contrary to popular belief, an average man's midlife is one of the happiest times of his existence.

I posted the following in response.

------

At some point you realize that you sold your entire life to a dream you didn't conceive. When you realize that this "dream" was not your own, it's earth shattering. At that point you set out to "redefine" yourself. You buy things you've always wanted in a vain attempt to prove to someone (God knows who) that despite your years of selling out "to the dream", you still possess your own humanity. Having not experienced this for myself, I cannot say for sure whether these people find it or not. It is my hope for their own humanity and peace of mind that they do.
2009 notables and moving forward in 2010.
In the last year, I have met some of the sharpest and most motivated individuals I have ever seen.  I have come to know them as friends, and I hope they do the same.
In May I bought a house in Irving.  Seems like a simple enough gesture, but to me it was a symbolic.....like a warrior using his sword to draw a circle in the sand around him.  With all the unknowns swirling about, this is the path I will plot and where I will stand against headwind and all opposition. 
Much like with El Paso house on Upson back in 2004, this concrete gesture brought much stability to chaos and gave direction to uncertainty. 

Many friends seemed content to usher out 2009.  I felt the same about 2008.

Looking forward 2010 to me looks to be a mixed bag.
I don't anticipate any major upheavels on the job front.  There may be talk in the future about transitions, but it is not to be this year.
 
For school, I have two and a half years left as of right now.  This is also when the view is the darkest.  Right now this almost exactly the middle of a tunnel....you're far enough down the road you can't turn back but the end is a far away dot of light down the line.
 
I have a feeling that we will be losing my grandmother whose health has been deteriorating for quite some time this year.  I also have an uncle who has been diagnosed with aggressive cancer in his pancrease.  Every day is a gift in situations like these.
 
So far the trip to Mongolia with Judge Spurlock is still on for July.  We will be going there to lecture the president of the country and his cabinet about the tenants of Democracy.  
What the hell do I know about that?  What do any of us really know about how or why our own republic truly functions?
 
There is talk of a trip to Cuba this May.  We'll see about that.
 
In the meantime, school starts again January 11th.
 
A New Year's Resolution
So yea, it *has* been that long since the last blog.  Over a year since any thoughts of significance have been immortalized as electrons.  I can't say why it's been so long....ok actually I can.  Law school.  It's a hell of a thing, quite the intellectual journey.  It's also a good way to eat up any and all available time.
 
I had developed a tradition of looking back at the last year's blogs and seeing how the year had developed.  Doing this, you quickly see that life is a game of inches.  We change so subtly from day to day and month to month.
 
The review for 2009 was easy: Zero blog entries.  Hey!
 
I'm not big New Year Resolution guy, but I think I'm going to try to do at least one blog entry a week.
Phone call tonight
You never had a chance, did you baby
So good-looking, so insecure
And now you say you can't remember
When the lines you drew began to blur

Yeah, when all of this is over
Should I lose you in the smoke
I want you to know you were the one

And may my love travel with you everywhere
Yeah, may my love travel with you always
Just found this wesley willis song.
From the genius mind that gave us the Chicken Cow song and I whupped batman's ass comes another sure fire solid gold hit. Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you:
 

 
Inflation is Zimbabwe...
....is now 230 million percent.  Is that even a number??

Last Thursday the government introduced a 100 million dollar bill.
Prices have increased so much since then, that today the government had introduce another denomination: a 200 million dollar bill.

Fun fact: This is not the worst inflation that has ever been experienced.  In fact it is only third on the list.  The record goes to Hungary.  At one point in 1946 prices were doubling ever 15.6 hours.

The estimated inflation rate: 12,950,000,000,000,000 percent.
(A gold star to anyone who knows what this number is.  What comes after a trillion?)


Ebay has 100 million dollar bills for sale.  I think I'll buy a couple and frame them.  God knows they aren't good for anything else.
Dear abby

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are still at odds over something that happened months ago. He, his best friend and my 13-year-old son, "Mark," went to spring training in Florida. On one of the days, they went to lunch at a restaurant that features scantily clad waitresses. My husband told Mark not to tell me about it and to leave the telling to him.

When they returned home on Sunday after their three-day weekend, Mark let it slip where they had gone for lunch one day. I hit the roof!

Mark is a very young 13. I was furious that my husband took him to a place that Mark described as making him feel "uncomfortable" because of all the skin that was being shown. After I jumped on my husband for doing it, I heard him outside yelling at Mark for telling me before he had a chance to.

I'm being accused of overreacting, Abby. Am I? -- PROTECTIVE LIONESS IN ATLANTA

DEAR LIONESS: I don't think so. If your husband had been proud of what he had done, he wouldn't have asked Mark to keep it a secret. His request was both dishonest and sexist. It was an invitation to your son to join the "boy's club" and exclude you, and it makes me wonder what the next indiscretion your son would have been asked to cover up would have involved.

 

Dear Abby / Lioness:

1.  "Scantily clad waitresses."  It's Hooter's for god's sake.  There is more scantily clad women kicking it at the beach or sunbathing at your local university (God bless the grass fields at A&M in the spring time).

2. The father was correct to yell at the boy, as the son is a snitch.  Snitches get stiches. 

Furthermore it is the father's job to teach the kid how to be a "team player".  Dude needs to learn that narcing on pops (as well as any other guy with which one is involved in "bad things") is bad form and is an agregious violation of manlaw.

3. The son is gay....not that there's anything wrong with that.

 

The "boy's club" is how men socialize.  I'm not a relationship counselor, I just play one on the internet, but it sounds like the dad didn't want to tell mom because he knows she is insecure and prudish about these things.

I don't know.  I detected the distinct smell of "crazy" dripping off of that letter.

Recollections of a relationship from 2006.
After moving back to El Paso in 2003 and all the events that happened there after, the time from 2004 up until last year was a strange time for me.  Previous events had made me rather relationship phobic (made?  past tense lol wut?) at times.  Since moving to Dallas, away from the debauchery of the El Paso crew (don't get me wrong, I love you guys!), it's really taken me out of my comfort zone.  Being out of your comfort zone and having to rebuild your social network is as good a time as any to reflect on where you've been and where things may be going.  I sought to keep people constantly around because it offered distraction and a form of affirmation.  Without the social distractions around, I'm forced to take a harder look at things.  This is a process that started in early - mid 2007 but should have taken place way before that.

Personal growth means looking back at all the good things we've done, as well as the not so good things.  I personally think there is way more to be learned from the not so good things.  It's easy to smile and wave and pretend that everything is all good when things are going your way.  But it's in the fires of adversity and in the difficult task of examining where we failed and why that really teaches us about outselves.

I think it's no mystery to anyone reading this blog that relationships with the fairer sex haven't been my strong suit over the past few years.  One particular past relationship that is on my mind tonight was back in 2006 (it would be highly ironic to mention the name here as she and I once had a conversation about being mentioned in blogs without permission, so I won't).  Anyway, she was a great gal.  Time and not-so great relationships would demonstrate just how good she was to me.

This leads me to Hard truth number 1:  I didn't feel I was worthy of affection, so her great treatment freaked me the hell out.  At the time I didn't know why I felt so uncomfortable with it, but time has proven an apt teacher.  I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop.  In my mind, it was only a matter of time before she woke up one day and said "Joke is on you!  You really suck!"  As I said, she was a great gal so the odds were probably against this happening.  But my inability to accept compliments or affection made it very difficult to get closer to her.

Which led directly to hard truth number 2: I was terrified about what I would do to this great girl.  See, I know me.  And knowing me, I know that I need counter-balance in a relationship.  And not counter balance from the perspective of "I like McDonalds" versus "I like burger king."  I mean I need counter-balance like where I say "Give me dohnuts!  I want dohnuts for every meal!" and the woman being more responsible than I is suppose to say "That's not a good idea.  Here is some asparagus instead."  And I eat the asparagus.

I mean, I get bad ideas fairly routinely (big shock to the readership of this blog, let me tell ya).  I need to be gently (and not so sometimes) reminded of my dumbassness.

Now, IF I don't get this counter-balance or otherwise can sense where my limits are, I keep pushing and pushing and pushing until I run right the fuck over people.  It's what I do.  As I said, I know me.  And one day, it dawned on me that that was what was happening here.  I was totally taking her for granted because I was fairly sure she would let me.  At least history up to that point said so.  And that sucked because....have I mentioned she was a great gal?

Anyway, I felt bad.  Real bad.  I broke it off.  This great gal cried, and I felt worse.  It didn't take long for the first inklings about maybe I had made a mistake to creep in.

We guys complain sometimes so mightily about jaded women and women who seem bitter etc.
I'm here to tell you, it's dealing with insecure guy bullshit like this that makes them that way.

I hope she's not that way today.
Perhaps someday I'll get to tell her in person that I was wrong and I am sorry.
And then perhaps after that we can go get a pint and eat pretzels.
XM - Sirrius Merger
I've been jonesing hard for XM ever since I sold my Saturn....wait, I haven't blogged at all about that.  Ok.  Let me back up.  In early October, I sold my maroon Saturn and bought a 2005 Honda Civic.  The good news: It eliminated the monthly car payment and I went from 20 - 23 MPG to 34+ (life is happening).  The bad news: The Honda didn't have XM radio in it, thus the re-descending into commercial radio hell.

So that's up to current.

Anyway, I've been itching to get XM again over the last month mainly for two reasons: 1) On long drives it is really really nice to be able to tune in to one station the whole time and 2) Commerical radio with it's short play lists, annoying DJs, and horde of commercials is just THAT bad. 

XM made a tempting offer: $30 for a receiver that would work with my car.  But I'm too cheap, so I said no.  Then basketball season started, and it would be really nice to listen to the Suns games while studying.  But still, I waited.  It was announced that for a mere $3 more, XM listeners could get the "best of sirrius" package which includes every NFL game.  But alas the intertia was strong with this one. 

But what was bugging me was that since the merger had been approved, all these new features were announced....but we still had no idea how the stations were going to be consolidated.

Well yesterday (Nov. 12) at around 2 in the morning all was revealed.
Lo and behold, ALL of my top stations are gone (Fine Tuning, Lucy, Ethel, Fred,  The System, XM Pops, and Fungus).  And if the forums are to be believed, the playlists of those that are left are substantially more shallow.

Of all those, the loss of "Fine Tuning" hurts the most.  They were genre free and very ecclectic.  It was the *ONLY* XM station I could listen to all day.  It was a great way to find new songs to go out and download....er.....go out to the local record store and buy.  Yea, that's the ticket.

The loss of that station alone is going to make it difficult to justify paying for radio.  The ole Ipod only goes so far, and of course it doesn't introduce the listener to anything new.  Guess it's time to wait a few more months and see what shakes out.
Election predictions
In keeping with tradition in 2004 and 2006, this is the Federal election blog:

There really isn't much to write here.  I haven't really been paying attention to this race since back around the middle of September.  This disinterest corresponds roughly to 1) The torts professor stepping up the pace of the readings and 2) Obama opening up a big lead. 

This race is going to be anti-climatic compared to 2000 and 2004.  Much is being made about the parties gearing up for possible lawsuits, etc but it won't matter.  John McCain is going to lose big tomorrow (my favorite quote so far has been on commentor on Fark saying he was "going to get curb stomped").

Popular vote prediction:
Obama: 54
McCain: 46

Electoral College Prediction (said curb stomping, 280 votes needed to win):
Obama: 341
McCain: 197

In short, it won't be a good day to be a Republican.  

The far more interesting discussions will come in the days and weeks after when the GOP soul searching begins.  Conservatism as we know it is dead.  Bush knew it back in 2000 when he adopted his "compassionate conservatism" mantra.  George Will called it six years ago, and then again in a Newsweek column back in March. 

It is an ideology that is arose in the early 1960's as a cultural and political response to the social upheavels of the time and in response to the Soviet Union.  As an ideology, it has run its course and is no longer resonating with the voters of today.  The election results will prove that.

After the loses in 2000, the Democratic leadership huddled down and reexamined the party's values.  What emerged from that was a more moderate and centerists Democratic party.  If the Republicans wish to remain viable, then they will need to do the same.

On the local front, I'll be voting yes to Prop 4 in Irving which will allow alcohol sales in the stores.  It is amazing here that you can't walk into a 7-11 or a grocery store and pick up a six pack.

Any opportunity, no matter how miniscule or abstract, to stick my right index finger in MADD's eye is alright with me.

/Readies the flaming bag of poo.....
1 - 10 Next

 ‭(Hidden)‬ Admin Links